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| Gourd koteka. Source: Yahoo! Groups. |
By Gundhramns Hammer
October 21, 2013
Select, paste & translate
WARNING: CONTENT NOT SUITABLE FOR SENSITIVE FOLKS!
Genitalia packaging is as old as mankind. Throughout history men have devised ingenious ways to confine their penises.
This is, of course, without mentioning the XXI century weirdos who are into drilling their phallus to insert all sorts of wires and rings. Those macho men who want to make their penises look like Xmas trees. Male genital modifications (Fig. 1) are beyond the scope of this writing.
Penis wrappers or sheaths come in a wide variety of shapes and materials. They may be simple sheaths from simple basketry pouches made of tree leaves to more sophisticated and elaborate manhood packaging fabricated from sea shells, animal skins, horns, gourds, bamboos, carved wood, just to mention a few.
Penis sheathing is not just confined to Papua-New Guinea, as most people think. This custom has been recorded in all of the continents, including the Pacific Islands, with the exception of Antarctica, of course.
Although there have been females who have followed the phallus confinement fashion in ancient Egypt, historically men have been the ones to wear penis sheaths.
In some instances, it is suspected that penis wrapping was done to mask medical problems in the genital area. This is the case in Medieval Europe.
Medieval men who had contracted syphilis (Fig. 2) were always oozing and discharging masses of putrid stuff (pus mixed with blood) (Fig. 3) from their fucking pricks and ganglion swellings in the groin.
So, barber physicians who were always hungry for money, as are some of their modern counterparts, in cahoots with their blacksmith or tailor cousins, had to come up with ways to put the whole decomposing manhood package inside a portable genital basket.
Thus came about the fashion of wearing a codpiece (ME, cod, meaning scrotum). But more than a fashion, codpieces became a medical necessity (Reed, 2004) for sick fuckers.
In medieval times, Italy for instance, if you were a man, the more you fucked, the higher your chance to get syphilis.
Fucking around in the olden days in Europe was a risky business. And still is today, anyway.
So whenever you see a painting from that time, around 15th century, chances are that the man who is portrayed on the canvas was trying to hide and protect his rotten balls and decaying prick from the flies, cockroaches, rats, dogs or vultures. And of course, from the eyes of his curious fucking neighbours.
Since the biggest fuckers in the block were men who belonged to the rich classes and had to go around with their genitals neatly wrapped in linen, velvet, wool or silk (Fig. 4) or in a plain or jeweled metallic package (Fig. 5), it stands to reason that the rest of the flock of stupid human sheep would follow suit.
And so it was. Voilà... The codpiece became quite fashionable from coast to coast in medieval European society. It was an instant winner. Wearing a codpiece was the in thing to do up until the 17th century in Europe.
Packaging ding dongs in gourds: Koteka
Codpieces were not cheap, though. A pretentious medieval European mercenary or a Don Juan who wanted to impress his mademoiselle could be in debt forever with the usurer in the corner of the central piazza.
On the other hand, in other parts of the world, men had come up with easy, inexpensive and nature friendly solutions. Men had invented simpler and cheaper methods to cover their pricks and at the same time look cute.
In Papua, for example, men are famous for their manhood packaging. Men wear gourd sheaths called koteka (Paniaian, meaning clothing) to cover their genitals.
Koteka come in different shapes (straight, curved, curled, etc.) and lengths (10-20 cm, for boys; 30-60 cm, for adult men) (Fig. 6).
If a Papuan man wants to have a straight kotek, all he has to do is to go to his garden and hang a stone to the maturing gourd in the vine, usually Lagenaria siceraria or Nepenthes mirabilis. Should he wish a curved kotek, he makes a small transverse cut or ties a string in the gourd so that it will grow curled (Fig. 7).
Just like any businessman or company CEO in any modern metropolis has many colourful ties (phallic symbols) in his closet, so does a Papuan man. But instead of ties he has a sophisticated penis sheath set, an entire collection of koteka in different sizes and shapes.
A Koteka set, each piece for the right occasion, be it impressing a woman or going to a party, in which case he would choose to wear an adorned and elaborate kotek; going off to work, for which he would pick out a short kotek; or wearing the longest kotek around the village, to make his quarrelsome neighbour worry and stay awake long nights thinking and figuring out ways to make his own penis sheath even longer.
And as in the Peruvian Andes where the various villages can be distinguished by their hats, so it is in Papua with the koteka.
Different tribes can be distinguished by the way they wear their koteka, at an angle, straight out, straight up, or by the lengths and shape of their genital sheaths. Koteka are a tribal signature.
Nevertheless, there appears to be no relationship between the size of the Koteka and social status of its owner.
At the present time, wearing Western clothing is mandatory in schools and government buildings. Sorry, no koteka.
How about koteka in churches?
As expected, wherever Europeans went they took their own religions with them and stuffed them up into the local people´s gullets.
Even though Christ may have conquered many a local people´s hearts, you may still see a man wearing his best kotek in a church on sunday in the Baliem Valley, central Papua.
Koteka wearers have become a tourist attraction nowadays in Papua (Fig. 8, Videos 1-5).
This is, of course, without mentioning the XXI century weirdos who are into drilling their phallus to insert all sorts of wires and rings. Those macho men who want to make their penises look like Xmas trees. Male genital modifications (Fig. 1) are beyond the scope of this writing.
 |
| Figure 1. Examples of cheap male genital modification. Source: Rowanchilde (1995). |
Penis wrappers or sheaths come in a wide variety of shapes and materials. They may be simple sheaths from simple basketry pouches made of tree leaves to more sophisticated and elaborate manhood packaging fabricated from sea shells, animal skins, horns, gourds, bamboos, carved wood, just to mention a few.
Penis sheathing is not just confined to Papua-New Guinea, as most people think. This custom has been recorded in all of the continents, including the Pacific Islands, with the exception of Antarctica, of course.
Although there have been females who have followed the phallus confinement fashion in ancient Egypt, historically men have been the ones to wear penis sheaths.
In some instances, it is suspected that penis wrapping was done to mask medical problems in the genital area. This is the case in Medieval Europe.
Medieval men who had contracted syphilis (Fig. 2) were always oozing and discharging masses of putrid stuff (pus mixed with blood) (Fig. 3) from their fucking pricks and ganglion swellings in the groin.
 |
| Figure 2. Masculine syphilis. Source: Enfermedades Venéreas. |
 |
| Figure 3. Penis suppurating pus. Source: Healthline. |
So, barber physicians who were always hungry for money, as are some of their modern counterparts, in cahoots with their blacksmith or tailor cousins, had to come up with ways to put the whole decomposing manhood package inside a portable genital basket.
Thus came about the fashion of wearing a codpiece (ME, cod, meaning scrotum). But more than a fashion, codpieces became a medical necessity (Reed, 2004) for sick fuckers.
In medieval times, Italy for instance, if you were a man, the more you fucked, the higher your chance to get syphilis.
Fucking around in the olden days in Europe was a risky business. And still is today, anyway.
So whenever you see a painting from that time, around 15th century, chances are that the man who is portrayed on the canvas was trying to hide and protect his rotten balls and decaying prick from the flies, cockroaches, rats, dogs or vultures. And of course, from the eyes of his curious fucking neighbours.
Since the biggest fuckers in the block were men who belonged to the rich classes and had to go around with their genitals neatly wrapped in linen, velvet, wool or silk (Fig. 4) or in a plain or jeweled metallic package (Fig. 5), it stands to reason that the rest of the flock of stupid human sheep would follow suit.
 |
| Figure 4. A man (Guidobaldo della Rovere, Duke of Urbino, 1532) wearing a codpiece. Source: Google Images. |
 |
| Figure 5. A metallic codpiece. Source: Google Images. |
And so it was. Voilà... The codpiece became quite fashionable from coast to coast in medieval European society. It was an instant winner. Wearing a codpiece was the in thing to do up until the 17th century in Europe.
Packaging ding dongs in gourds: Koteka
Codpieces were not cheap, though. A pretentious medieval European mercenary or a Don Juan who wanted to impress his mademoiselle could be in debt forever with the usurer in the corner of the central piazza.
On the other hand, in other parts of the world, men had come up with easy, inexpensive and nature friendly solutions. Men had invented simpler and cheaper methods to cover their pricks and at the same time look cute.
In Papua, for example, men are famous for their manhood packaging. Men wear gourd sheaths called koteka (Paniaian, meaning clothing) to cover their genitals.
Koteka come in different shapes (straight, curved, curled, etc.) and lengths (10-20 cm, for boys; 30-60 cm, for adult men) (Fig. 6).
 |
| Figure 6. Papuan men wearing koteka. Source: New Mandala. |
If a Papuan man wants to have a straight kotek, all he has to do is to go to his garden and hang a stone to the maturing gourd in the vine, usually Lagenaria siceraria or Nepenthes mirabilis. Should he wish a curved kotek, he makes a small transverse cut or ties a string in the gourd so that it will grow curled (Fig. 7).
 |
| Figure 7. Example of a curled koteka. Source: Ucko (1969). |
Just like any businessman or company CEO in any modern metropolis has many colourful ties (phallic symbols) in his closet, so does a Papuan man. But instead of ties he has a sophisticated penis sheath set, an entire collection of koteka in different sizes and shapes.
A Koteka set, each piece for the right occasion, be it impressing a woman or going to a party, in which case he would choose to wear an adorned and elaborate kotek; going off to work, for which he would pick out a short kotek; or wearing the longest kotek around the village, to make his quarrelsome neighbour worry and stay awake long nights thinking and figuring out ways to make his own penis sheath even longer.
And as in the Peruvian Andes where the various villages can be distinguished by their hats, so it is in Papua with the koteka.
Different tribes can be distinguished by the way they wear their koteka, at an angle, straight out, straight up, or by the lengths and shape of their genital sheaths. Koteka are a tribal signature.
Nevertheless, there appears to be no relationship between the size of the Koteka and social status of its owner.
As usual, wherever there are goverments there are human blood suckers. These human vampires have a way of sticking their fucking noses in other people´s business.
Koteka wearers in Papua have had their share of this.
In 1971-72, the Indonesian government mounted its Operasi Koteka (Koteka Operation) to pressure men to quit wearing koteka and pursuade them to wear Western shorts and shirts.
In other words, the government´s idea was to "modernise" folks who lived in the bush and thus throw them into the giant consumer market of the ever growing national clothing industry.
The
campaign was a failure and was eventually cancelled.
Since local people could not afford to purchase tonnes of
outfits, as any squandering Western family does, and did not have the money to buy soap to wash their laundry and moreover had the habit of
wearing the modern clothes until they became rags, skin fungal diseases
popped out.
So, some smart men decided to throw away their fucking western clothes and go back to their beloved koteka, the only clothing they have always known and manly too.
But not all modern clothes went to waste. Some women turned dresses into carrying bags, a sort of simple backpack slung around the head, and men made hats out of the shorts.
Of course, things are changing in the Papuan hinterland, although not as fast as the government would wish.
More and more people are becoming westernised and the koteka are being worn only by older men.
At the present time, wearing Western clothing is mandatory in schools and government buildings. Sorry, no koteka.
How about koteka in churches?
As expected, wherever Europeans went they took their own religions with them and stuffed them up into the local people´s gullets.
Even though Christ may have conquered many a local people´s hearts, you may still see a man wearing his best kotek in a church on sunday in the Baliem Valley, central Papua.
Koteka wearers have become a tourist attraction nowadays in Papua (Fig. 8, Videos 1-5).
 |
| Figure 8. A tourist in Papua. Source: foto-foto locuku. |
And just in case you are wondering - what do men do with their koteka when nature calls or want to get laid?
They take them off to piss or fuck. Very colourful language, don´t you think? Unless you have to use it, academic rambling is boring and often sucks!
No Papuan man has ever been recorded of being impaled with a kotek stuck in his ass. Well, if it did happen, men would not tell the field anthropologists, anyway.
So, now you know. If you want to impress your lady, go to Papua and get yourself a koteka set.
A cheaper alternative would be for you to go to your garage or backyard and get busy building yourself a Western Kotek from a piece of PVC or galvanised piping.
Or if you really want to get fancy, how about turning one of your old leather boots into a codpiece (Fig. 9):
 |
| Figure 4. A leather codpiece. Source: Google Images. |
Now, remember, whatever you do, we are not responsible for any property damage or whatever outcome you may bring about with your ding dong packaging adventure.
Such is the fucking human zoo.
References
Reed C. S. (2004). The Codpiece: Social Fashion or Medical Need. Internal Med. J., Occ. Med. Ser., 34: 684-686.
Rowanchilde R. (1995). Male Genital Modification: Sexual Selection Interpretation. Human Nat., 7 (2): 189-215.
Rowanchilde R. (1995). Male Genital Modification: Sexual Selection Interpretation. Human Nat., 7 (2): 189-215.
Ucko P. J. (1969). Penis Sheaths: A Comparative Study. Proc. R. Anthopol. Inst. G. Britain & Ireland, No. 69: 24-67.
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