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martes, 24 de febrero de 2015

DON QUIXOTE POOPED HIS PANTS: THE GREEN GIANT FROM HELL

Source: Letralia.


By Gundhramns Hammer
February 24, 2015
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The man from other time, always thinking of other times, really had the hots for his sweet Dulcinea. He was head over heels, day and night dreaming of her sweet lips. His only concern was that no other man should ever penetrate her castle unless it was his rigid gallant cavalry.

But the wind was blowing strong and Don Quixote of La Mancha was able to pick up the smell of an impending battle. 

  • Don Sancho, wake up, you lazy bum, Don Quixote urged.
  • What!....what!..., Don Pancho mumbled, barely opening his eyes and yawning. But he immediately went back to sleep. At least he tried, for Don Quixote was shaking up scare shitless.
  • I hear a funny noise! I think it is a giant getting ready his weapons to fight me!, said Don Quixote.
  • Fuck!, go back to bed and we´ll deal with whatever is out there tomorrow!, Don Sancho muttered.


That night Don Quixote could not sleep at all. He kept his guard, lest the enemy would come to him whilst he was sawing oak wood.

And Don Quixote was damn right. A giant was really getting up his battle gear ready to fight his mighty spear.

And giant was it for sure! Don Quixote (Fig. 1) would soon face his biggest enemy ever!
 
Figure 1. Don Quixote de la Mancha and Don Sancho Panza. Source: Wikipedia.



But this time, Don Quixote was fucked. His enemy was a real monster. There was no way Don Quixote would beat this fucking bastard to pulp.

Next day in the morning, upon seen the monster on the vast plain whose noise had kept him awake, shaking and shivering like a recently plucked guitar string all night long, Don Quixote pooped in his pants and fainted right on the spot. So did Don Sancho!

Nonetheless, someone else was really happy about what happened that day. 

Rocinante, Don Quixote´s elegant horse, had the day off. The beast did not give a fuck about the biggest green devil taken out of hell his master had ever seen in his crazy crusades.

What in the hell did Don Quixote of La Mancha and Don Sancho Panza see that forced them to shit in their pants, an act that Dulcinea for sure would have intensively disliked or made her vomit on the spot?

Here is what they saw. Well, at least this is what they thought they saw that fateful and unforgetable day: A green giant from hell (Video 1):


Video 1. Don Quixote´s nightmare: The biggest windmill in the world.



Anyway, who could blame Don Quixote de la Mancha and his sidekick, Don Sancho Panza, for acting so ungentlemanly standing before such an enemy in the battlefield?

If you did not know what it was, you would probably be scared shitless too.

Considering that there is an invasion of these giants upon ourselves all over the world, Don Quixote would be extremely busy today, sweating it out, working his butt off to fight and bring down these monsters for a long, long time.

What would Don Miguel de Cervantes y Saavedra, the creator of Don Quixote, have thought of it had he seen these giant wind turbines? 

His masterpiece would probably have another windy twist.


The green iceberg

This business of wind power is a green iceberg. We only see its tip. 

More so when you consider other things that the wind - the power that moves the rotor blades of the windmills - usually leaves out untouched many a nongreen things under the cover of green frills. 

You have to scrape your own granita to find out what the heck this green iceberg is hiding underneath.

So, the keen green investigator can dig the rest of the rest to rest what remains in the rest to rest to what everyone should rest to get to the bottom of the rest. To do the rest under the rest of what is now pushed as "green" in man´s nongreen economic machine. 

Now, upon scraping like crazy to get to see the rest of the green iceberg, don´t be surprise if you come up against a big laundering machine


How green are these giants?

By this time, we all know that that man has come up with a new bandwagon to excuse his anti-biospherical course: Green energy. 

But mon Capitaine, can we really call wind energy green? 

No, mon ami

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